The Quest for the Holy Fail

It’s not a pub crawl… it’s a pub crusade!

The three bawdiest tour guides in New Market are on a quest to find the filthiest, most reprehensible, and yet inexplicably hilarious joke, song, or limerick ever devised by the human brain, and they want you to join them.

In this two-hour tour through the seedy underbelly of what passes of wit in the alehouses of the Renaissance, the Holy Heralds of Hops will ply you with dirty jokes, lewd songs, drinking games, general debauchery, and of course beer – five to be exact – all the better to lubricate your tongues. Your commemorative tasting glass is yours to keep, and at the end of the crusade, the participant who provides the most inappropriate source of laughter for the rest of us will receive a special prize of (dis)honor to mark their contribution to the Holy Heralds of Hops’ epic Quest of the Holy Fail.


(Dependent on Date)

11:00am, 2:00pm, & 5:00pm

Duration of Pub Crawl:

2 hours

Number of Pub Stops:


Number of Drinks Included:

5 (8oz tasting pours)


$45 per person (plus fees)

Please meet at least 10 minutes before your crawl start time at THE TAP, booth 162, with your e-ticket and photo ID.

Proper protection required! Our crusade is a perilous one, fraught with plagues, close contact, and the rancid breath of our enemies. As such, to drink from our casks, you are required to wear masks!

Warning: This event is for adults, 21 years of age or older. Adult Humor is employed regularly.

Pub Crawl ticket alone does not include admission into the Texas Renaissance Festival. In order to attend the Pub Crawl, you must purchase a separate matching date specific Admission Ticket to TRF PRIOR TO ARRIVAL. You will not be able to gain access to the Pub Crawl without following these guidelines. Group Discount Packages available thru Vee at

You must be
21 or older with valid ID to participate in the Pub Crawl. If we cannot verify your age, you will not be allowed to participate. TABC rules apply.
If you would like to purchase tickets for the Pub Crawl on the day of your desired Crawl, please go in person to the DragonSlayer Shop (Booth 163) and purchase tickets there. If tickets are available, they will be happy to help you with your purchase and confirmation.


The Festival is rain or shine, and so is the Pub Crawl. As a rule, once purchased there are no refunds for tickets, except under very specific circumstances.

Contact us at
Remember though, that our email is only checked between the hours of 9am-5pm during the week. We do not check the email on Festival Days. No email request is confirmed until you receive a confirmation directly from us in reply.